fragile

there are times such that i want to hold the world in my palm as gentle as if made of glass or babies or me
times i want to cup orange seashells and shiny blue stones and whisper in their ears sweet soothings
times i want to kiss them and carry them and love them, keep them as mine
and then there are times i find a slice of the universe in my palm and all i can do is close my first around it until it shatters and splinters into my flesh
times i want to drop the pieces back into the waves as earth-ashes, in irreparable disarray, as if to say that perhaps I’m not the most fragile thing out there
times i want to crush shells and rocks and know that i too can be a glacier or wind or acid rain, know that i too can erode the world around me, if not for the better then at least at all
times i see blades of grass and think to pull them apart snip by snip by snip; show that sometimes i can unravel more than just myself
i want to fight back and scream with my hands that i destroy what i choose to destroy; break what i choose to break; crumble everything i can just because i can
but there are times such that i want to hold the world in my palm as gentle as if made of glass or babies or me
to whisper-kiss, keep and love
days i wish the world would do the same for me, tell me sometimes it’s okay to be the most fragile thing out there

By Eileen Ellis